it's amazing what a little music can do.

she leaned in the doorway to the kitchen as i was washing dishes explaining how tired she was feeling. she sat on the floor and asked for help taking off her pink velcro sneakers. she melted down at my request to put them in the shoe basket, she was too tired and her throat was hurting the tiniest bit. "go lay on the couch little one, i'll put your shoes away." i continue the dishes, she curls up and falls asleep. i look, grab a lavender blanket out of the closet and lay it over her, go back to the kitchen. itunes on shuffle and an old nora jones comes on. the music sends me back five years to the NICU where i would sit, rocking, holding my little one, gazing at the wonder of it all, scared with the unknowns. sitting, listening to nora play from the little radio at the nurses admittance desk. my baby's station was so close, the music was so quiet, but we heard it. i was pulled to the living room, picked up my baby, rocked her in the lavender blanket. stared at her. closed my eyes. remembered the other families with us during that time. baby A and baby B, twin boys with parents who were there day and night and back and forth when baby B had to be transferred, they'd been there so long. thought of all the families in the NICU right now. with sadness and gratitude, i cried.